Monday, April 18, 2016

Take a Chill Pill and Get Over it because Who Cares?

My friends don't like my driving. It's because I get angry. 

I was raised to be angry. It's not my fault.

The nice thing about not having to take responsibility for how you feel, is that you are also not responsible for how you act.

Many times people have told me that they didn't like me the first time we met.

This makes me sad.

Sad because I almost never even remember meeting them in the first place, and that means that my memory is going.

I do feel bad though. Not because I don't remember them, but because they remembered me.

It always surprises me that anyone gives a shit about how I treat them.

I guess when you have no real self esteem, it comes as a surprise when someone, "esteems" you.

Paradoxically, I take it as a compliment and I have made efforts to be nicer to people that I meet, but they tend to be selling me donuts.

I do get angry though. But it's usually at other people who are angry because I am angry.

A little back story, there are times, and they are many, when I say something dumb.

I know, hard to believe.

So I say stupid shit and here's why, I am dumb.

I've always been dumb, it's something you get used to.

Over the years I have developed a strategy. I deliberately say anything that comes out of my mouth. And then I laugh, hahahaha.

Get it, I was being sarcastic. Wait, what did I say? Yeah, just kidding.

So people get mad because I say dumb shit. Then I get mad because I don't even remember what I said. Then they get mad because I'm laughing at them for being dumb because they thought something I said was worth getting mad about. Then I notice that we are enjoying getting mad. Kind of like how my dog wags her tail when she's barking.

Did I mention that before? I don't know, either way it's a timeless analogy.

Dog's are timeless.

So and so's skateboarding trick, not timeless. Except for the Gonz.

Yeah, I'm that guy.

So everyone is angry because of evolution. We evolved to get angry so we can kill an animal with our bare hands and eat it without feeling bad. Then some super evolved indigenous people's decided to have respect for the earth and appreciate the animals. Then some other people who were still angry and thought that they were supposed to be angry because they wanted gold and stuff and god, instead of just food, killed them and took their stuff and now there are a lot of people who think that they are angry because they need something that someone else has or needs and god!

Ok, let's just calm down.

Fortunately we live in a society that has given us everything that we could ever want or need and we can watch tv and be entertained and eat delicious food and make fun of our friends even though we love them. 

The point being? When the little red hand is blinking, that means don't walk. The numbers are there just to tell people who are already in the crosswalk how much time until the light turns red and sometimes I can only make that right turn because I'm in the financial district and 500 people are all J walking together because of crowd mentality and the cop is mad because I'm yelling.

See, now your'e mad.


  1. what just happened?! i think i went somewhere...somewhere strange.

  2. With my being senile I've probably said this before, but I so love your sarcasm, humor, and really good points. These need to be compiled into a book! You're definitely high on my favorite bloggers list.